But things aren't the same anymore.

I've heard that soo many times. Countless.
In fact, i've said it before. But as this year is fastly coming to an end.
It only makes sense to laugh at myself for that. Well I mean, of course things aren't the same, nor will they ever go back to it.
Change is part of improvement-and call me practical but i think it's safe to say we, if not most, of us want to improve.
Watever area in one's life it is, improvement is sought after.
Honestly though, sometimes the fact that I WILL change, not that I MIGHT , I will change is frightening.
It's not possible to go through a whole year of experiences, heartbreaks, drama, wat have you, without being changed in some way.
Even if it's a glimpse of subtle change, You're changed.
And thanks to the plain but so true statement JAY KV told me:

"I didn't have a choice.
Get effed over real bad and you'll end up with the same mentality as me"
Check 'er out: http://wtfreads.blogspot.com/

That's real talk. && Yes I know It's JUST LIFE, GET OVER IT! Sometimes i won't have a choice in life, it's called destiny.
And i'm not tryin' to Diss you JAY KV; because you're right, but i look at it and i don't want to change into
someone who doesn't Love that easily, or is so cautious. Because I DO WANT TO BE LOVED.
AND I WANT TO LOVE TO.
In fact; For me it's necessity.
Without feeling loved, I wouldn't be able to function.
But What happens when i do get effed over?
Is it just the end of Love for me?
I mean it's fact I WILL change into someone different.
i don't yet know who i'll turn into, because i sure wont' be ME.
The one person who's eyes I stare into each morning.
I'll be a product of someone's else's damage.
I'd have lost a part of me, a part of my loving soul; who foolishly allowed this one person;
the wrong person; to take a piece of myself which I handed them so wilingly.
Only to have them stare me in the eye and laugh right at me.
Compassion nowhere in sight.
What then?